Episode
5 Snark Recap
Pink
Panda: The clan is back in Manila after their family vacation
in Cebu. Ruffa’s kids tease her that she’s blooming lately, which, of course,
means that she has a new beau.
Chunkie:
She
defensively tells them that “Jordan” and she are just friends but we know
better.
Pink
Panda: Sarah joins Alexa for her prenatal workout class and I’m
impressed and partly worried that she can twist and bend that way.
Chunkie:
Meanwhile,
Raymond says he’s ready for a new commitment and so he borrows Rocky’s dog,
Gizmo.
Pink
Panda: Aww, he’s so tiny and cute.
Chunkie:
But, apparently Raymond doesn’t think so, he
calls Gizmo ‘basic’ followed by: “Nobody needs a basic Chihuahua.”
Pink
Panda: His comments are pretentious although funny: “I can’t
even take care of myself on a Friday night.” “I look obese next to this dog.”
Chunkie:
He
plays with Gizmo in the backyard until Gizmo leaves him a ‘present’, he picks
it up like it’s infectious or something.
Pink
Panda: Richard and Sarah takes baby Zion to a pre-school where
he plays around with Dad. And awww, he’s so cute in the confessionals (he even
has his own corny captions)
Chunkie:
Richard
comes up with all this ridiculous ideas he wants Zion to do which Sarah shoots
down immediately.
Pink
Panda: Like teaching Zion jujitsu, Sarah: “He’s just 1 (y/o)”,
and he even wants Zion to meet a baby lion.
Chunkie:
Raymond
dresses up Gizmo and gives him a make-over. They head to a dog spa so he can
dye Gizmo’s fur. What. Really?
Pink
Panda: He quotes, “I have hair color so the dog should have
hair color.”
Chunkie:
*shakes head”
Pink
Panda: We don’t get to see the results but Raymond looks
shocked.
Chunkie:
Ruffa
is in the middle of a check-up with Sarah’s doctor and she asks if she can freeze
her eggs cause she wants to have more babies in the future.
Pink
Panda: Doc replies that she can but she needs to think it
through because of the possibility that she might have twins (or even triplets)
and she exclaims that she only wants one
Chunkie:
She
leaves hopeful although a little dejected.
Pink
Panda: We’re back to Raymond and OMG! Gizmo’s yellow.
Chunkie:
What
the F---??
Pink
Panda: I want to cry, I seriously want to cry. This is so ridiculous,
poor Gizmo.
Chunkie:
And,
of course, Rocky is shocked and pissed when he sees Gizmo and calls Raymond an
asshole.
Pink
Panda: Tell him Rocky!
Chunkie:
Raymond
just tells him that it’s the trend nowadays and in the confessionals, he decides
that he’s not ready for a commitment after all.
Pink
Panda: After doing all that to a harmless puppy? You shallow,
pretentious ass!!
Chunkie:
And he just leaves Gizmo like that. *rolls
eyes*
Pink
Panda: Sarah celebrates her birthday in a Moroccan-themed
party. MC/asshole Raymond asks her what she wants now that she’s 21
Chunkie:
Aside
from happiness and good health, she answers that she wants twin and the camera
turns to Richard who shakes his head.
Pink
Panda: Sarah’s mom, Esther, is in attendance and chats with
everyone except Annabelle since they’re still in war.
Chunkie:
Annabelle
wants Esther to approach her first since she declares that she did nothing
wrong. O-kay, whatever you say.
Pink
Panda: Ruffa pulls Mom aside to share what Sarah told her in
confidence; that Sarah’s period is delayed
Chunkie:
And,
Annabelle is understandably sad cause it hasn’t been that long since they had
Baby Zion. And, that ends Episode 5.
Pink
Panda: They ended this ep with the tag: “No animals were harmed
during the production of this episode.” But, that’s not an assurance for me.
Dyeing Gizmo (an awful bright yellow) was too much and it’s sad to think that
Raymond did it just for the show.
Chunkie:
Yeah!
If they didn’t need something buzz-worthy, they would have just left the poor
dog alone.
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